I just returned from extended work travel. It was productive and the honbun met me up in Vancouver for a relaxing weekend. No thoughts about IVF just enjoying each others company and having fun together.
This weekend, we had an extremely productive couple of days. Cleaned the back yard, ordered a new door, organized some closets. And oh yeah, we listed all DE candidates in an excel spread sheet. The sad thing is that none of them are perfect. The one I like the most is 33 years old and not available until May. She has participated in 3 other cycles. Choice number 2 is available now, but she is slightly overweight and not a proven donor.
We have decided to go with a donor who will match our blood types. We plan to reveal the truth to the child when they are older, don't know what age, but I think it was confusing to me to find out when I was 12.
The plan is to find a new RE, try one more cycle with my own little eggies and then move to DE if we have to. I added up the costs recently, and they are frightening. The only other thing that I have spent more money on is the house. I think of all the vacations I could have gone on with that money.
3 comments:
I think you can come to my house! I would make you cookies! We have so much to do here, the yardwork stuff feels overwhelming as the snow is pulling back it is just crazy how much needs to be done. I look outside and really? I just want to nap.
Your babymaking plan sounds like a good one. I think there is such solace in a plan. I really do. I want to know what is next, and what if.
Good for you for having some semblance of a normal life with your sweetie both in Vancouver and in your yard.
And know without a doubt I am pulling for you, wanting this to work for you, your eggs please if possible. And if not, with the right donor.
I've wondered about DE (eggs or embryos) disclosure too and there are some sites out there with different info. IN some ways I think I would disclose from the beginning so there was never "the talk", just something that is true; but with the complexity of it, what words would I use? Blathered on here a bit, forgive me. Warmly, Kate
I love Vancouver. It's one of my favorite cities and it sounds like you were really able to relax. Thank you for your comment....it really helped me put the process in perspective and gave me peace. Wishing you the best.
Glad you got some fun non-IVF time. Hoping your next cycle works so you don't need to go the DE route, but I think you are wise to get a donor lined up just in case. After my experience I would go with the proven donor, but of course they are all unproven at some point. Slightly overweight is a lifestyle choice (IMHO), if she were huge that would be another thing (and they wouldn't accept her as a donor). Do both donors have plausible bloodtypes?
Good luck whatever you decide - hope you have good luck with the new RE.
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