Life is unfair

I can't believe it. One of my coworkers is pregnant. For the fourth time. Because she forgot to take BCP. Her "boyfriend" doesn't want to have anything to do with the baby. Now, she is going to be a single mom with FOUR kids. I mean, that just sucks. Here we are desperate to have a child and there she is in the unfortunate situation of having a child.

I am sure that the IUI didn't work. My temperature dropped this morning. AF should be here within two days. I don't think I will even go in for the beta test. It will just be too disappointing. I know that the chances were slim, but we had such a great sperm number 75 million. Thats a lot of little guys running around.

I am frightened what the RE is going to tell me. They can't explain my response to the last fertility drugs. I blame the lupron. I guess when my body is suppressed, it really is suppressed.

I think what I hate most is waiting. I am not a very patient person especially when things are not in my control. Why does it seem that everything takes so long? Well, we'll see what my temperature is tomorrow am and go from there.

The waiting game

Well, just five days left. I have to take a home pregnancy test. There is no way I can wait until Thursday for the HCG result. I had progesterone done on Thursday. It was 46. They told me "you definitely ovulated." I had known that already. My temperature is a full degree higher than it is during the non-luteal phase.

I started BBT when we were first TTC. I think it is the most amazing thing. If I ever get my dream job of being a science education advisor to the government, I would make it mandatory for all girls in high school to chart their cycles for at least three months. It would be a mutidisciplinary project. Data gathering and graphing, physiology (you could discuss all of the hormones and how they function), and it would also be health education, It might even help identify students who might have ovulatory dysfunction.

Oh, I know this is highly unfeasible. It is sexist and would never pass the scrutiny of anti birth control pundits. But I can still dream. At least if I have a girl I will teach her about her body.